For 3 months I have been holding on to the most wonderful secret. On Sunday, September 26, 2010 we discovered that we were once again going to be blessed with a baby in our home. You would think after three kids we would be used to this or it just become mundane. It is most certainly not.
Becoming pregnant had always been sort of comical in our house. We never "tried" to have a baby. Our first blessing surprised us since babies were a couple years out for us. Our second came when Chiara was only 10 months old....I am pretty sure David just smiled at me and it was done! Hee hee....seriously. When it came to having number 3 we made the decision and 2 months later we were with child. Easy as pie. I have talked to so many who have struggled to have their precious bundles and I know not to take for granted the ease with which we conceive.
David and I had always talked about having 4 children....though this was before we had THREE girls. Three of the same sex is just a different dynamic. I always envisioned my home being a house of balance-boys and girls. The Lord decided differently. He surely knows us even better than we know ourselves. We started trying in the Spring and after months we both thought it was not for us to have another. I went through a wide range of emotions and after a couple more months I finally let go of the idea of having that fourth child. Well, before we left for Disneyland something magical sure did happen.
I am quite in tune with my body.....I am like a clock and I can notice the slightest of changes. Right away something was different. I can remember being at the hotel in CA and brushing my teeth-I gagged. I am not someone who usually does that and yet I did. Strange. Then, way off my normal cycle I broke out on my face-something that I had not had happen since changing my diet. Strange. It started to clear up....then broke out again. Huh? Hmmmmm....I started suspecting right away, but then of course thought maybe I was just going to have a rough period that month. September 25, 2010 I knew. I was having back cramping which I never get before my period. I bought a test without telling David on Sunday, took it, called him upstairs and with tears in my eyes showed him the results. His disbelief was a complete reflection of my feelings. We both went into a sort of shock.
We have never kept any of our pregnancies a secret for long. We never waited the standard 3 months. This time was different. It took us a month to move from shock to surprise then another month to move from surprise to just joy and excitement. The joy and excitement was always there, but masked by....really? Wow! What? We told a few close friends.....we both needed people to talk to. Then, about week 6 I got very sick. Nauseous. Awful. After a couple weeks of that we had to tell the girls. I was napping daily and feeling awful. I did not want to teach and I knew I could not keep lying to them. I can't believe how well they kept this to themselves or asked before telling someone. We let them tell my parents so they would have someone to talk to about it.
I am relieved to not have to try and hide the bump or how icky I feel. I am not as nauseous as I once was, but I am better. The exhaustion is passing....just in time for the Christmas season to get here! This will be my 4th c-section; my second scheduled one....and my last. My OB and I have very slightly conflicting due dates, but in the end I will get to pick the birthday. It will be at the very end of May most likely. As with Leah I know it will be nice to have a goal date.