I am a middle child and I have never felt "short-changed" by my parents, but it has made me aware of what a middle child's needs are. They have never had you all to them selves and they know it-Mayah knows it. Lately she has been seeking time with us-alone.
I was blessed today by a friend that had Chiara over for a play date-alone. Chiara is 4 and this has been so good for her. She needs her space not only from Mayah, but from me. I am mom, but I am also teacher. We both need to miss one another every so often. Anyway, these play dates Chiara goes on by herself are a double blessing. I am able to give so much more attention to Mayah. Today Leah was asleep for most of the time Chiara was gone. At first Mayah just played with the castle and princess stuff. I enjoyed just listening to her play. She has great dialogue and imagination. She has learned a lot from playing with Chiara-it was nice to hear Mayah's version of it. I can remember how much Chiara liked playing by herself when it was just her (or Mayah was an infant). Mayah does not get a lot of that kind of time and it was a gift for me to hear that today.
After I did my cleaning I invited her in to the kitchen to make cookies. She was so excited! She did not have to share putting in the ingredients. She did not have to make room for anyone on the step stool. She did not have to worry about someone else sneaking bites! We both wore aprons-she has not liked this before, but today was different. After the first batch as in the oven she went back to her princess play. I let the cookies cool a bit, poured some milk for us both and we shared warm cookies and milk. It was very special. We talked....well, she talked and I listened. I enjoy that so much more than me talking and her listening. Of course the entire conversation is about Disney still and I have heard it before, but I did not care. Everything she said was important and I wanted her to know that. I believe she did. Nothing cuter than a kid full of joy talking through a mouth full of cookies just to tell you about Mickey's house again.
I am not sure if she will always be a "middle", but for now she is and I enjoy making her feel as special as the other two.
3.24.2009
Managing the Middle
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I am so glad you got some good one on one with Mayah. And a very yummy treat. :) I savor those moments with Eden, when Kevin takes Lily to band practice with him. Lily feels special and so does Eden. I think it is very important.
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